Published: Jul 26, 2024
The Detrimental Effects of Enabling Behavior in "Boy Moms
Updated Friday, March 1, 2024 at 3:37 AM CDT
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The Dangerous Pattern of Always Taking Their Sons' Side
When it comes to parenting, there is a concerning pattern that has emerged among some mothers, particularly those known as "boy moms." These parents have a tendency to always take their sons' side, even in situations where their behavior is clearly inappropriate or harmful. This enabling behavior can have detrimental effects on both the child and society in the long run.
One observation made by the author is that this behavior is more commonly seen in mothers rather than fathers. They have noticed instances where boys misbehave in school, and their mothers immediately rush to defend them, blaming others for their sons' actions. In fact, the author's cousin, who is a teacher, has experienced three severe instances of misbehavior in her class, all involving boys whose mothers defended them and refused to acknowledge their wrongdoing.
What makes this behavior even more concerning is that these mothers often showcase their beliefs on social media, promoting the idea of not believing in bad children and advocating for gentle parenting. However, the author argues that this kind of enabling behavior only contributes to their sons' sociopathic tendencies. By constantly defending their sons and never holding them accountable, these mothers are essentially allowing their children to believe that they can do no wrong.
The author criticizes these parents for being easily manipulated by their fourth-grade children, highlighting that their sons have no respect for them. This lack of respect is evident in the boys' poor social skills and the fact that they struggle to make friends. It is a direct result of their mothers' enabling behavior, which shields them from the consequences of their actions.
One teacher even predicts that if this enabling behavior continues, one of these boys may end up in jail by the time he reaches middle school. This is a stark warning of the potential long-term consequences of always taking a child's side, regardless of their behavior.
Being a "boy mom" or an entitled parent, in general, does not make one a good parent. In fact, it can be a danger to society. The author highlights a personal story shared by a friend, where her brother was treated favorably compared to her, receiving better gifts and privileges. This disparity in treatment can have lasting effects on children's self-esteem and create a sense of entitlement.
Toxic masculinity is also attributed to these types of parents, both those who enable their sons and those who teach them to tolerate mistreatment from women. The author points out a TikTok video where a mother encourages her son to accept mistreatment from women, despite the unlikelihood of finding a partner with such behavior. Both parenting styles, according to the author, are disastrous, and children should be taught to respect themselves and others regardless of gender.
Enabling behavior is not limited to "boy moms." Another reader shares a personal experience from the 90s, where they observed a mother treating her son significantly better than her daughter. This disparity in treatment was noticed not only by the reader but also by their parents, who found it sad and unfair.
Even in adulthood, enabling behavior can have severe consequences. A reader with experience teaching adults believes that parents who always "rescue" their children from teachers are not good parents. They argue that this behavior essentially creates monsters, as these children never learn to take responsibility for their actions. The question arises: who will come to the rescue of these children when their parents are no longer around?
It is important to note that enabling behavior is not exclusive to mothers. Another reader acknowledges that there are fathers who enable their sons but argues that fathers tend to do this more with their daughters. They often exhibit creepy behavior, joking about pulling guns on their daughters' boyfriends and enabling their daughters' bad behavior because they find it cute. This failure to teach independence and self-sufficiency to their daughters can create a sense of entitlement.
Enabling behavior in "boy moms" or any entitled parent can have detrimental effects on both the child and society. It is important for parents to hold their children accountable for their actions and teach them the values of respect, independence, and self-sufficiency. By doing so, we can raise responsible individuals who contribute positively to society.
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